Break-ups

[Mayavi Morpheus]

I believe in the good old fashioned thing called love. You fall in love, and it has to be like that of the swans - togetherness for life.

Well, how do u know u 'love' a gal without being wid her for some time - which in western world is called dating. And then when you hang out wid her, you realise he/she is not what you are really looking for. what then? Would you still love her anyway?

[Wisecrack]

I believe in the good old fashioned thing called love. You fall in love, and it has to be like that of the swans - togetherness for life.

Well, how do u know u 'love' a gal without being wid her for some time - which in western world is called dating.

True.But something called "Dating" would only begin once you've found that someone does indeed share ur interests,thoughts and feelings.You would try to know the person first and then plunge into something labelled as Dating,right?

And then when you hang out wid her, you realise he/she is not what you are really looking for. what then? Would you still love her anyway?

That wouldnt really happen if you commit yourself to the person first and then get to know him/her,rather than the vice-versa. Even if it did happen to me, I would still like the person,coz we can always be friends!

[SeH]

I second you lucifer.

That wouldnt really happen if you commit yourself to the person first and then get to know him/her,rather than the vice-versa. Even if it did happen to me, I would still like the person,coz we can always be friends!

Am not sure how 'em ppl cud be friends after a break-up, and more over this (Shall we be friends) dialog is by the gurl often.

[lonewolf]

Am not sure how 'em ppl cud be friends after a break-up, and more over this (Shall we be friends) dialog is by the gurl often.

You'll see an instance of this in American Pie 2.

[SeH]

Am not sure how 'em ppl cud be friends after a break-up, and more over this (Shall we be friends) dialog is by the gurl often.

You'll see an instance of this in American Pie 2.

ohhh come on dude... that was sick

[lizard king]

Break ups ay!

[CtrlAltDel]

yes...but i married the last one tho

nice
can I ask, how is she different from others?

well all i can say is she was refreshingly different from the rest of the gals...



to answer Lucifer, i'd like to say that i dont agree with him. there is this grey area where u have not yet found your mate. at that time its most natural and understandable to go thru various relationships until one finds the right person who matches the wavelength perfectly.



if we are to wait till know a person fully before even dating that person, IMO we'd be spending all weekends alone!



there is nothing wrong in dating a person, getting to know him/her better before committing ourselves. it is difficult to know a person fully until we get very close to him/her and closeness generally comes during the dating phase.



sometimes dating can be for fun without an intention to commit...like for example most school or college romances. many of them breakup with no regrets at all. even if there is heartbreak it would not lost long for most people. we come out of the breakup with a better understanding of the opposite sex and can use the experience to forge a stronger relationship in future, when we are ready for it.



lastly who can forget the thrill of dating various persons...

[lizard king]

And about being friends fter a break up, it totally depends on the kind of break up you have had. Cos if it was a mutual break up and we still pretend we are friends.... no matter how much we try to stop ourselves, when we are left alone in each other s company, i am sure we ll end up in bed (given both of them are still single).

And if it was a bitter break up... damn.... how can u even see the other person s face?let alone being friends!

[SeH]

And about being friends fter a break up, it totally depends on the kind of break up you have had. Cos if it was a mutual break up and we still pretend we are friends.... no matter how much we try to stop ourselves, when we are left alone in each other s company, i am sure we ll end up in bed (given both of them are still single).
And if it was a bitter break up... damn.... how can u even see the other person s face?let alone being friends!

What if they ended up in bed and then had a bitter breakup.... can they still be "FRIENDS". No hard feeling lizzy, just wanted to know some opinions and people's deifnitions of friendship.

[spamtaneous]

mayavi...u never told me..who did u dump...

yeah... It happened suddenly y'day night.

who did u dump...not when/how did u dump....

[Ar!e$]

mayavi...u never told me..who did u dump...

yeah... It happened suddenly y'day night.

who did u dump...not when/how did u dump....

tumko kia karna hain..

[lonewolf]

Am not sure how 'em ppl cud be friends after a break-up, and more over this (Shall we be friends) dialog is by the gurl often.

You'll see an instance of this in American Pie 2.

ohhh come on dude... that was sick

Hey, I was referring to Kevin and Vicki



In case you don't remember, after their breakup, Vicki and Kevin decide to be "just good friends". Towards the end, when Vicki has a date, Kevin gets angry and leaves the party.

[spamtaneous]

humko kuch nai karna....mai to aap hi ke liye pooch raha tha.....

mayavi...u never told me..who did u dump...

yeah... It happened suddenly y'day night.

who did u dump...not when/how did u dump....

tumko kia karna hain..

btw...it wasnt u ...is it?

[Lucifer]

I had thought that people would disagree with me. And I am sad about the people who did. If you say being with the person helps you decide whether you have the same wavelengths or not, and consequently makes you fall in love then you have not felt that spark that comes when there is instant electricity. That is true love, and unless you have been there you will never understand what I am talking about.

[san]

Love can bring a lot of misery too



If you do fall truly and madly in love, you pretty much accept the person for who/what he/she is.



hmmm love, millions of butterflies fluttering in your tummy; the warm sensation of delicious dark choclate; the smell, the sound, the thoughts that linger forever and if you don't end up together the pain and longing could fill the rest of your life. If that's not scary, what is?



(pls Luci, don't u start again on love & misery not going together ;P)

[mayumi]

That's why as much as possible I don't want to fall deeply inlove coz I am afraid of break ups



I've been thru a lot of break ups with my 'puppy lubs' when I was in high school but didn't mind it coz it was just a fling, u see



What I am afraid of is to commit to a serious relationship and love that person too much and at the end, in any possible reason, we have to let go of each other ......I am not yet ready for that

[lizard king]

And about being friends fter a break up, it totally depends on the kind of break up you have had. Cos if it was a mutual break up and we still pretend we are friends.... no matter how much we try to stop ourselves, when we are left alone in each other s company, i am sure we ll end up in bed (given both of them are still single).
And if it was a bitter break up... damn.... how can u even see the other person s face?let alone being friends!

What if they ended up in bed and then had a bitter breakup.... can they still be "FRIENDS". No hard feeling lizzy, just wanted to know some opinions and people's deifnitions of friendship.

I think we have been misreading each other here. I mean, i took the scenario for granted that a couple while together did have a physical relationship.

That's why as much as possible I don't want to fall deeply inlove coz I am afraid of break ups

A typical case of pavlovian conditioning.

[CtrlAltDel]

And I am sad about the people who did.

i have noticed that u r feeling sad abt lots of things lately.
have a few pegs of neat scotch, sab sadness bhaag jayega...

If you say being with the person helps you decide whether you have the same wavelengths or not, and consequently makes you fall in love then you have not felt that spark that comes when there is instant electricity.

instant electricity can easily turn out to be a flash in the pan. the concept u r talking about is purely based in how the other person looks and behaves in public, coz u dont yet know how she is on the inside.

what u say holds true to a certain extent only where the couple are friends for a long time before taking their relationship to another level.

That is true love, and unless you have been there you will never understand what I am talking about.

'true love' comes only to a mature mind after studying the other person for a reasonable length of time. all else is pure infatuation or lust.



it is perfectly natural for anyone to pass thru more than one relationship/crushes before settling on one who is Mr. or Ms. Right.

[fl]

i have staid off this topic for a long time

since i dont have a lectuer and nothin better to do

lemme put what i think



all that has been discussed is extremely subjective

i dont think there is a universal definition for love

and according to my definitions of all the terms used here, i dont agree with any of the views expressed

I believe that not many people in india actually "date" mote than 1 person

and now ill introdue a few new terms missing from this thread

outing

thats what most people do and mistake then for dates (according to my definition ofcourse)

if u have just met a person and u ask him/her out and are out somewhere getting to know each othere, i would prefer call it an outing and not a date. date is when u go out with a person u share certain commitment with and i guess when u are commited to some extent u can call it love.

people go out with a lot of people and date a few loke one/two.

i also think there is nothing like the one

i dont think that everyone is that unique that u cant find a similar person anywhere

[Mayavi Morpheus]

I will just pen down some thoughts here...



No man or woman is perfect. Every one has some positives and negatives. We all try to project the positive side of our personality to impress the opposite sex and mask the negatives.

In some cases we are not aware of the negatives of our personality. Everyone of us has certain habits which they are so used to that they find them normal behavious, but the other person may find it annoying.

When you are attracted to a person, you are attracted to the positive side only unless you are friends with him/her for a long time and had a chance to study him/her.

In your mind you always have certain expectations from your partner.

When you enter in a relationship, you start spending more time with the person and you will start observing every move, every habit closely. The negative aspects of the personality become visible.

Sometimes you adjust, sometimes you wont.

Finally, when it comes to making the big decision, you weigh the positives and negatives. It all comes down to how much you are willing to sacrifice that decides the outcome.

If there are more negatives than positives, you move on. Then another one comes, you repeat the same cycle. And then another one comes. And then you get older and your thought process changes. what was important to you 2 or 3 years ago would no longer be important anymore. You may be willing to sacrifice more than what you would have done earlier, thats when you marry.

[CtrlAltDel]

well put mayavi!

[Sharjeel]

Good writing, man!

[Ar!e$]

humko kuch nai karna....mai to aap hi ke liye pooch raha tha.....

mayavi...u never told me..who did u dump...

yeah... It happened suddenly y'day night.

who did u dump...not when/how did u dump....

tumko kia karna hain..

btw...it wasnt u ...is it?

hell no it wasnt me..

[pavan deep]

hiii....

i think breakups last as long as u want them to and hurt as deep as u want dem to...i have had 2 break ups....and here i am....succcesfully out of dem..its jsut the way how u percieve things dear..

i know it hurts...it does hurt a lot when u brk up but...life is abt moving on...and i think those guys wid whom i broke up were not worthy enuf of my luv...i dont say dat...they were wrong or i was wrong...all i can say is...its part of life..and i have learnt a lot from my prev breakups...all i can tell now is..its the decision of alife time dear...so plz dont compromise and giveup ur self respect for someone who doesnt deserve it...u will feel now dat..u shud have compromised...but one thing....once if u fall..den its u who has to fall always....dats it...if u r ready to sar jhukana and stuff all thru ur life...den fine..go ahead and compromise...dats it...

take care...

bye

[spamtaneous]

break-ups some time lead to break-downs